I Was Sad -- A BAD Paragraph: A Writing Lesson

     I am up to my neck in writing.  My head is swirling with thoughts about writing.  My brain is exploding with writing thoughts.  I have little scraps of paper everywhere.  They say things like, "Exposition -- what we do most" and "must PLAN" and "same persuasive letter -- 2 audiences" and "the best way to get better is to DO ie. piano, math, instrument, writing."  

     You see, this Friday, I begin teaching two writing classes to intermediate students at our homeschool co-op.

     Today, I typed up our first activity.  Sometimes the best way to teach a subject is to show the students what NOT to do.  I had so much fun with it that I had to share it with you!  Feel free to use it with your own students.

     Have the student read the paragraph out loud, and then do the activity at the bottom.

I Was Sad

By Mrs. Mullin

     I am supposed to write about a time I was sad recently.  Here goes,  Today, I took down my Christmas tree.  that made me sad.  I took off all the ownamants.  There weas a lot of them.  It was empty.  I looked at the tree.  It made me sad.  It was bare.  And plain.  Just green with lights.  Other people were watching football.  It reminded me that i have to wait a long time until christmas comes back.  Isn’t that sad?  No more family time.  My in-laws came for the holidays. No more free time.  School is starting back, too.  Oh, and the presents.  I have to wait to get more presents.  I can’t wait until my birthday in February.  So, that’s why I was sad recently.

January 7, 2013 

The End

This is a BAD paragraph.

*How many “sentences” are in this paragraph?  _______

*Circle any mistakes that you see.  (Grammar, usage, mechanics)

*Which sentences are completely random?  Write “random” boldly above them.

*Underline the fragments?  A fragment is not a complete sentence. 

*Create a better title.

*Rewrite the pitiful topic sentence: 

*In your group, rewrite this paragraph.  Combine sentences.  Eliminate random thoughts.  Expand sentences.  Add some interesting details.  Oh please – fix this paragraph!

Write It Down: Journaling for Your Kids

      The scrapbooking craze began right before my oldest son was born, and I jumped on the bandwagon with all my heart ready to make wonderful scrapbooks filled with journaling in my own hand.  I would create photographic treasures that would live on forever.  I bought albums, pages, special pens and pencils, stickers, templates, punches, rulers, and more.  When he was seven years old, I finished his baby book, and it's truly a work of art.  My youngest son just turned ten, and if I'm lucky, I will start, ahem, finish his baby book before he goes to college.  Can I just say that perfectionists should not be allowed to scrapbook?  However, there is one thing I have been good at -- writing things down.
     I suffer from a bad memory, and I knew I wouldn't remember all those cute little things my boys would do and say.  I wanted to remember them, though, and so I decided to write them down.
     Before both of my sons were born, I purchased blank books to write in.  Each boy has a separate book so someday I can give it to him.  These books were not fancy; in fact, I bought one of them at the Dollar Store and two others at WalMart.  Each of the books begins with the story of his birth.  From there, I have written down lots of firsts -- first cereal, first steps, first visit to church.  I've also recorded their faith journeys which we were able to read to each boy before their joint baptism this past February.  I've written down funny moments galore:  the time my oldest brushed his newborn brother's hair with a toilet bowl brush or scribbled on a stranger's white car with an orange crayon.  I've noted the hilarious things they have said that still crack me up, like the time my youngest was working on his manners and said, "Mommy, I do not like this chicken you made.  Sorry, Ma'am."  I've written about staples in my oldest's head while his dad was in Chicago, and the concussion my youngest got on the basketball court.  I recorded the day my oldest decided to retire the stuffed bear he slept with every night for eleven years, the day I realized his voice was changing, and the day he became taller than me.

     Most importantly, though, those little books are filled with love from this mother's heart:  I love you, I'm so glad God gave you to me, you are so special, I thank God for you, I am so blessed to be your mom, I am so proud of you.
     So, if scrapbooking is not your thing, consider buying a journal and recording all those little moments because over time, they add up to a treasure that will live on forever.  It's not too late to get started!

Writing a Book Report -- A Guideline

     A book report is a great way for children to learn the arts of reading, summarizing, analyzing, and writing.  However, when my oldest wrote his first one, I searched and searched for some sort of guideline or outline -- something that he could use to get started.  I finally found an outline on the internet that I liked, and then I changed it to suit our needs.  
     The idea is that you use the questions to help your child write six paragraphs.  If each question in a section is answered, the paragraph will be pretty solid.  However, do not use each question as one sentence. (I've never been a stickler for:  "Each paragraph must have five sentences.")  If you do, you will have a book report that sounds like this:  "I read Blah by John Doe.  I chose it because it had a great cover.  It was written in 2011.  It won the Bad Book Award.  The author is famous for writing Yuck and Boring.  There are 1,000 copies of this book in print."  The sentences will be too short and choppy!  First, print out the outline, then the student can write notes to the side of each question or write out his or her own outline before writing the actual book report.
     I'm including the outline with my changes and additions, followed by a book report my oldest finished today!  I asked his permission to use it because it's a great way to see how a book report should flow, and many students learn by example!  

Book Report Outline

Title of Book:  ________________________  Author:  _______________

Introduction: 

_____Title (underlined), Author

_____If desired, why did you choose the book? 

_____When was it written? 

_____Has it won awards?  (check the back of the book)

_____ Is the author famous for writing another book?

_____ Are there millions of copies in print?  (check the back of the book)

_____ What else would you like to say?

I. Setting

_____ 1. What was the setting for this book?

(example: snow-covered wilderness)

_____ 2. Where did most of the action of the book take place?

(example: northern Alaska)

_____ 3. When did it take place?

(example: the 1880's)

_____ 4. Describe what was this place like.

(example: bitterly cold, desolate, lack of food)

_____ 5. Why do you think the author picked this setting for the story?

(example: to show how hard it was to survive in Alaska)

II. Main Character

_____ 1. Who or what was the main character of this book? (example: a wolf-dog named Butch)

_____ 2. What did this character look like?

(example: large head, thick body, heavy brown and black fur)

_____ 3. What kind of personality did the character have?

(example: fierce, fearless)

_____ 4. Give an example of one of his or her good traits.

(example: loyalty to his master)

_____ 5. Give an example of one of his or her faults.

(example: reckless, easily distracted)

_____ 6.  Are there other important characters?  Discuss them briefly. 

III. Plot

_____ 1. Briefly summarize the book’s plot in one sentence.

(example: a new dog fought for survival on a sled team)

_____ 2. What was the goal of the main character? (example: to become the lead dog on the sled team)

_____ 3. Why was he or she trying to accomplish this goal?

(example: he was tired of being abused)

_____ 4. Who or what was working against the main character?

(example: a large husky named Plato)

_____ 5. What was the climax of the book? How did things resolve or work out?

(example: when Butch fought to defend his master)

     Climax is the turning point in the book, the high point.  Everything in the book builds up to this point, the climax, and the conclusion usually follows soon after.

IV. Message/Theme

_____ 1. What was the message of this book?

(example: kindness will be repaid)

_____ 2. How did the author get his message across to the reader?

(example: he showed that an animal can sense and return love)

_____ 3. Give a specific example of this from the book.

(example: Butch slept near the man who showed him kindness)

_____ 4. Give another specific example of this from the book.

(example: Butch was given his freedom, but he chose to stay)

_____ 5. What do you think the author wanted you to learn or to feel after reading this story? (example: that love can be more powerful than physical strength)

V. Personal Review/Conclusion – Conclude by wrapping it all up.

_____ 1. Did this book hold your interest? 

_____ 2. Why or why not? (interesting, sad, boring, etc.)

_____ 3. What was the author’s writing style? 

_____ 4. Did you enjoy the author’s writing style? Why or why not?

_____ 5.  What were strengths or weaknesses of the book? 

_____ 6.  What was your favorite part?

_____ 7. Would you recommend this book to others? Why or why not?

A Book Report of A Single Shard

By Darius Mullin

     A Single Shard was written in 2001 by Linda Sue Park and has won the Newbery Award. Linda Sue Park is also the author of Seesaw Girl, The Kite Fighters, and When My Name Was Keoko. A Single Shard is great historical fiction.

     A Single Shard is staged in a small potter’s village, named Ch’ulp’o, off the west coast of mid-twelfth century Korea. The village is surrounded by forest and mountains and has a good view of the ocean. I think the author picked this setting because this is what a potter’s village was actually like.

     The main character of A Single Shard is a 12-year-old boy named Tree-ear who lives under a bridge with his mentor, foster parent, and friend, Crane-man. Tree-ear is eager, curious, loyal, polite, and enthusiastic; however, he is also sometimes foolish and does things without thinking. He works for Min, the best potter in the village who is often quick-tempered and grumpy.

     This book is the story of how Tree-ear worked for ‘The Honorable Potter,’ Min, and how he took two pots to the royal emissary in Songdo, that Min might become the royal potter. Tree-ear’s goal is to please Min enough that he would teach him to make a pot. Tree-ear admires pottery very much and wants to make a pot himself. The only thing in his way is Min himself, who is unwilling to teach him. The climax of the book is when, even though robbers ambush him on the way to Songdo, he takes one shard to the emissary… and gets his master the job!

     There are many messages in this book, but the most important is that good may come as long as you stay loyal to the end. Tree-ear is loyal even when times are tough, and, eventually, Min adopts him. For example, even when he is told by The Honorable Potter that he will never teach him to make a pot, he is still as loyal as ever. Another example is even when he is ambushed on the way to Songdo by robbers, he looks until he finds the remains of the pots and takes a shard to the emissary.

     When I finished the book I felt shocked, happy, and sad all at the same time. Because it was very well-written and entertaining, I found it hard to put down! My favorite part was Tree-ear’s journey. I would recommend this to anyone who wants to learn about Korea or just loves a good story.


(I assigned this book to my son because of his Korean heritage!)


I have searched and searched the internet to find the original source of the outline, but since I found it about two or three years ago, there are multiple copies of it on multiple sites.  In addition, I have changed it some to suit our needs.  Many thanks to the anonymous author.